The duality of "If you even imply that being aro or ace condemns someone to a sad and lonely life I will fucking fight you"
and
"being aro and ace is the most isolating thing I will ever experience"
The duality of "If you even imply that being aro or ace condemns someone to a sad and lonely life I will fucking fight you"
and
"being aro and ace is the most isolating thing I will ever experience"


if you have time, please watch the japanese drama 恋せぬふたり (koisenu futari; the two people who can’t fall in love) which focuses on two aroace characters
Sakuko finds it difficult to live in a society which operates under the assumption that people will fall in love with each other. She meets supermarket employee Takahashi when she goes to support a "fall-in-love" campaign by her junior at work. She is startled when she hears him say that there are people who don't fall in love. As Sakuko's mother keeps hurrying her to get married, she decides to move out and rent an apartment with her friend but her friend backs out at the last minute after reconciling with her ex-boyfriend. Just when Sakuko is about to give up, she ends up living with Takahashi under one roof because of their similar values towards romance.
“Everyone else and their orientations are able to bond and relate to the love and romance aspects and we’re over here like— We don’t do that.” - Jaiden Animations
Edit– link to vid <3 :
Anonymous asked:
I think I want romantic love without the romance.
As in, maybe I want a queerplatonic relationship. Or maybe I just want a friendship, but… committed? Like. Yes, you're my best friend, can we both agree on that? Can we make that official? Do we really need to, for it to be real?
I don't know. I just want a friend, but I want it to be a friend that I can hug for a long time, or hold hands with without it being weird. Someone who will be there for me when I need it. Someone I can be there for, too. Maybe multiple someone's, even—I've found I'm fully open to that too.
I don't think I'd ever truly want to kiss anyone, and I don't think I'd be attracted to them (romantically or otherwise) yet I'd still love them all the same. Just… different.
Does that make sense?
aroaceconfessions answered:
to preface THIS POST IS FOR AROMANTIC PEOPLE, AROSPEC AND OTHER A-SPEC PEOPLE ONLY. THIS WAS NOT WRITTEN FOR THE ENJOYMENT OF ALLOROMANTIC PEOPLE
im about to say something and potentially it will make some people unhappy and i am aware of this but it's my opinion and i'm going to say it anyway.
It's ok not to want to be aromantic.
Yes, I know this is probably not a great thing to say given the stigma we face and trying to do positivity and all that but i think it's important to recognise it.
The world is incredibly amatonormative. Romance is prioritised over almost everything else. And to be aromantic is to accept that you're not going to be able to experience this thing, this highly - well - romanticised thing, this thing that's so completely ingrained in culture (well, mainstream western culture at least. I'm not overly well-educated on other cultures so i won't make any sweeping statements about them) the way that you're 'supposed' or expected to, and I think it's okay not to want that. It's okay to hope that you aren't aromantic. It's okay to be upset when you find out that you are. You can mourn the theoretical relationships you'll never have and the inclusion that society will never give you because as a whole the population simply cannot seem to grasp the concept of not wanting or experiencing romantic love.
I see a lot of posts spreading aro positivity and talking about all the cool stuff that comes with it and i do of course think that they are important because being aromantic is incredibly cool and valid but i don't really see the other side of finding out you're aro talked about.
So if there is anyone out there who has recently discovered that they're aro and are upset about what they've lost, or are wondering if they're aro and are worried about what it means for them, i see you. You are not 'broken' or 'lesser', and you don't need to fit in with the rest of society. But it's okay to feel how you're feeling. It's okay to want to be alloromantic. You're not a 'bad' aro for wanting that and anyone who makes you feel like that is a twit. you can throw a bowl of limp spaghetti at them.
to reiterate THIS POST IS FOR AROMANTIC PEOPLE, AROSPEC AND OTHER A-SPEC PEOPLE ONLY. ALLOROMANTICS PLEASE DO NOT INTERACT
The upperclassman: I can excuse homophobia, but I draw the line at killing abusers.
Literally all the monsters: you can excuse homophobia?
Do you think the universe fights for souls to be together? Some things are too strange and strong to be coincidences. — Emery Allen
Mary spent her days buried in medical books. Sitting in the far corner of a coffee shop run by her family. A front to the public in case authorities came sniffing in their direction. A notebook and papers sprawled over the table. Pen ink spilled over several pages and a frustrated sound coming from her every few seconds. She blamed school.
The sounds she made were drowned out by the chatter of customers. Oblivious employees greeting each one and taking orders cheerfully. Children whining over a certain pastry that their parent didn’t buy. The longer she spent in her corner, listening, the more she regrets her decision to be there. Then she throws her pen when it runs out of ink.
The red pen didn’t hit the ground, or a wall, or another table or seat. No clatter was heard.
However, someone hissing at the sudden impact to their face was.
Mary looked up, and her frustration intensified. Because of course the pen refused to work on paper, but miraculously it suddenly had ink and left a mark on the strangers face. Mary slammed her notebook shut and gathered all her papers to shove into her bag. Ignoring the other as she stood and made to walk past him.
“Hey-“ He started.
She held up a hand to silence him. Took a deep breath before turning back to face him.
Only pausing when she met blue eyes. He reminded her of a carrot. Mary stared before she leaned forward to snatch her pen away from him.
Mary left and broke the pen as she walked away from the shop, throwing it in the next pile of trash she saw.
—
A week later, Mary could be seen staring at her year book. Finding the boy she threw a pen out. Without looking away, her hand moved blindly around the table before picking up a sharpie. Orange marker circled around the carrot boy several times. Reaching for a black marker, she crossed out his eyes.
A rabbit was adopted into her family, all so she had an excuse for why she kept chopping up carrots and throwing them out afterwards. Stuart was the only one who knew.
It was science class where she left mid lesson because the teacher was annoying her with the yip this yap that, repeating words from previous classes. Teaching topics and material they had already gone over.
He tried calling her back, only to be greeted with Mary telling him to fuck off.
Just before rounding a corner, she tripped over her own feet and landing face first. Curses flying out of her mouth, though she laid there a few moments before pushing herself up to be greeted by a hand.
Looking up to see who, and groaned when she processed it was carrot boy. He dropped his hand when he recognised who she was.
Mary laid back down, resting her head in her arms. Waiting for him to leave. Wanting to go back home to chop up carrots and give them to the rabbit that still needed a name. Maybe she’ll start bringing him to school, or was it a she? Mary hadn’t bothered to check. Maybe Stuart knows.
She reached for her phone, looking up to see that carrot boy hadn’t left.
He instead was sitting cross legged in front of her.
Mary had to bite her tongue to stop herself from making an inappropriate comment. If she did, that would be her opening up a conversation and she didn’t want anything to do with him. Let alone hold a conversation.
The message sent to Stuart about the rabbits gender was typed out quickly. Many spelling errors that she hadn’t bothered to fix before sending it. Carrot was still there. Mary stared at the ground.
Moment later she dropped her head to meet it, hoping to give herself a concussion or something.
“What the fuck” Carrot hissed, reaching over to lift her head. Mary only stared at him, annoyed more then ever now that it hadn’t worked.
“What would you name a rabbit?” She asked.
He stared with a puzzled look.
“What,” He whispered, shaking his head and looked up at the roof. Blinking several times when he had been met with a bright light and looked back down.
“Gender?”
“No idea.”
He pressed his lips together, the look on his face gave it away that he was trying to figure out if she was alright in the head or not. Questioning if the fall had made her lose it.
“I don’t know, Carrots?”
Mary snorted, pushing herself up and back onto her feet. Staring down at the boy, Nathan she recalled. The irony. Her phone vibrated in her hand, a glance and Stuart had responded. He didn’t know the gender either.
—
Two months later finds Mary wearing gloves up to her elbows, wearing all white and a mask. Blood staining the coat and blue gloves. She was working on wound after wound, the current one was her pulling out several bullets and doing what she could to prevent the man from dying.
Before that it was someone with a knife in their back, something Mary found funny was that it’d been a family member who did it. Another stabbed in the abdomen, the knife still there when she was brought in. Other members from different gangs, those with criminal records and questionable wounds came to her and other underground doctors that were able to help. There was several of them in the Hatford family.
Because why risk going to the hospital and having to stumble out a lie on why you’d been shot. Risk having the cops get involved.
Mary yawned into her arm, getting up take off her gloves and change her coat to a clean one, throwing the other into the bin. Leaving him there to rest. She got her pay and left the run down apartment. Answering her phone when it rang and groaned when another job was given to her. She had a test later on in the day, yet here she was, at two in the morning, going from place to place all just so some guys can live.
“Is this some sick joke?” Mary muttered, staring at her newest patient and forcing a smile. Digging nails into skin. “I must be hallucinating.” She told herself.
Because carrot boy sat on carpet, with an icepick sticking out of one shoulder. Blood oozing from his leg. Clutching his stomach with a pained look on his face. Blood was everywhere and Mary wasn’t even sure if it was all his or not.
He looked up, squinting at her. She ignored him.
His friend, Lola, explained what had happened. Very aggressively. Lola seemed to catch Mary and Nathan staring at each other and behaved like a jealous girlfriend who jumped to conclusions. Maybe she was his girlfriend?
“Did you name the rabbit yet?” He asked, his way of greeting. Mary heard the confusion at her being there, the suspension and the question he was asking himself.
“Yeah,” She said. Walking over and inspecting his wounds. Pressing a hand over his, taking joy over his wince and moved it aside so she could take a look at his stomach. “Named it asshole.”
He laughed.
Her stomach reacted weirdly and her heart stopped for a moment. Thoughts froze and she stared at him lost. A cough from behind snapped her out of it and Mary got back to work.
“Figure out the gender?” He asked.
“Forgot to check.”
Another laugh.
Mary continued her work, thoughts racing over how this happened. If she should ask. Wondered if he had a criminal record and was eager to know what he had done to get it. A thrill of the unknown was what kept her mouth shut.
For now she made up a story on how it happened.
Possessive girlfriend jumped to the conclusion that he was cheating, when he was probably just on the phone with a friend or family. Which led to a fight. He didn’t retaliate, the pussy. She eventually calmed down, realised what she’d done. Called the Hatford family in desperation. Which led to Mary being here. How Lola even knew who to call was a mystery. Though she could only suspect someone told her.
“Alright, longest who knows of my life.” She sighed, packing up her things and couldn’t be bothered to hide how exhausted she was.
Carrot boy watched as she accepted the money from Lola then left. He continued to stare at the door long after she was gone even as Lola cleaned up and talked about nonsense, used to him not responding.
—
Mary hummed to herself, climbing out a classroom window to get away from her math teacher while she wasn’t looking. The hag droned on about something ridiculous while writing out equations on the chalkboard. Her classmates only watched, helping her escape when she needed it.
Walking on the roof of the school wasn’t as eventful as it could be. The drop below would be painful if she slipped. Only for a moment anyway as the impact would kill her. Then she spotted her way down. Would require her to jump down to another roof that was underneath her, but it was the quickest way down unless she wanted to go hunting for an empty classroom.
While making her way down, she did slip. A yelp coming from her as she gripped the roof just before she continued her fall. Fuck. At least she wasn’t on the high roof no more. But this drop would still hurt, she was too far away from the pole and didn’t want to risk climbing towards it.
A whistle from down below caught her attention. Carrot boy stood there looking up at her with a quirked eyebrow. Of course he was here. Mary went a month and two weeks without seeing him anywhere and yet here he was. Staring up at her as she hangs on a roof for dear life.
“Need any help?” He asked, clearly amused.
“Nope, I’m perfectly fine,“ She responded, attempting to pull herself back up and failing. “Have a good day!” She started to move sideways to the pole. Jumping when she felt something touch her foot. “Could you not!?”
“Just drop, I’ll catch you.” He said instead. Holding out his arms.
“Fuck no.”
Mary made it to the pole and reached for it and just her luck, her palms were sweating like a pig. She did end up falling and wasn’t able to catch herself, was ready to hit to ground, her feet would just hurt for the rest of the day.
Only, Carrot boy did catch her. Looking down at her in his arms for the second it lasted before she was pushing off of him.
“Your girlfriend wouldn’t be so pleased if she saw that.” Mary said, rolling her eyes at the thought alone.
“Girlfriend?” He questioned. “Oh, you mean Lola, yeah no, not my girlfriend.” He looked disgusted at the idea of it.
Mary only stared at him, not believing him and only held up her hands as a way to say it wasn’t any of her business. She turned to leave. He stopped her by grabbing her arm.
“I still don’t know your name,“ He said, grinning when she turned back to look at him. “Well, I do know your last name is Hatford but I don’t think you’d like me calling you that.”
“Oh? What makes you say that?”
“Just a hunch.” He dropped his hand and shrugged.
Mary thought about it. She knew his name, Nathan Wesninski and she’s given him a nickname since day one. Not that he knows that.
“I don’t know your name either.” She lied, you know, like a liar.
He rolled his eyes, as if calling bullshit but chose to humour her.
“Nathan Wesninski.” He answered. “Your turn.”
“Mary Hatford.”
Lola made an appearance then, calling out his name.
Mary left when Nathan’s back was turned.
—
Day later Mary smuggled the rabbit into school. Asshole had been a nuisance the past week unless she was around and so her parents had demanded she take the rabbit to school with her or they got rid of it. Turns out the rabbit wasn’t the only asshole in the family.
She didn’t bother hiding the little one, holding Asshole in her arms as she made her way around the school. Glaring at anyone who got to comfortable and tried to hold him. or her. Mary lifted the bunny up and then realised she had no idea how to actually check and if it was similar to dogs or not.
Holding Asshole by her hip with one arm, her spare hand typed away on her phone. Searching for how to tell a rabbits sex. While being busy, she failed to realise until too late that Asshole wiggled its way out and dropped the the floor, and was apparently on Sonic the Hedgehog and had the same illness only Asshole wasn’t blue nor could Asshole say ‘gotta go fast.’
So, she made chase. Naturally. Otherwise she had a bag full of random greens for nothing if she lost the rabbit. Mary had discovered later on that she shouldn’t be feeding Asshole so much carrot.
“Wonder if I could tempt Asshole into eating a certain carrot boy though.” She murmured, almost running into a door while trying to catch her pet.
Someone else did.
They didn’t look pleased either.
“Ms. Hatford, this wouldn’t happen to be your pet would it?” The deputy principal questioned, standing up and holding onto the rabbit.
Just before she could answer, a whistle sounded along with the fire alarm going off. The deputy handed Asshole over to Mary and told her to evacuate while leaving to go round up other classes.
Mary could only stare as she pet Asshole. Stood there processing what had just happened and turned around just in time to see Nathan, who looked ready to scare her. His eyes darted down and grinned.
“Is this Asshole?” He asked, scratching the rabbits head gently. “You’re welcome by the way.” Nathan looked up and realised he needed to clarify. “There’s no fire, I just set off the alarm. Friends are burning paper though if that counts as a fire.”
Mary stayed silent, only shaking her head and unable to stop herself from smiling. Didn’t do anything when Nathan decided to hold Asshole. Questioned herself why she even let him touch her rabbit. Let alone hold.
“Know the gender yet?” He asked, laughing at the shake of her head. “Little Asshole here takes offence.”
Nathan continued to talk. Mary only stared.
Footsteps. Mary peeked over his shoulder, as best she could as he was taller then her, and spotted Lola making her way over.
“Your girlfriends on her way.” She told him, reaching out to take Asshole back. Pausing at the pained look on Nathan’s face. “What?”
“Help get rid of her?”
A snort.
“How do you propose I do that?” She dropped her voice to a whisper as Lola got closer.
“Kiss me.” He hurried out, whispering also. Colour rising to his ears and Mary still thought carrot, only to then process what he said.
“What!? no way!” She reached out to take Asshole once again, stepping closer when he took a step back. Mary looked up at him with a glare, ready to tell him off.
He leaned down and stole a kiss.
Mary’s brain malfunctioned, her heart came to a halt and there was that funny feeling in her stomach again.
Both their eyes were opening, only staring at each other. Mary sighed through her nose and raised a hand and placed it at the base of his neck, pulling him closer and found his hair was surprisingly soft that she ended up playing with it. Both closing their eyes.
A shriek.
Mary only laughed against Nathan’s mouth, pulling back and grabbing Asshole in the process and looked to find Lola standing next to them.
“Oh hey.” She greeted, waving at the furious girl.
Carrot boy has a tomato as a friend. Interesting combination. Though from his expression, Mary doubted her saw them as friends.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Lola asked, glaring at the both of them.
“Leaving.” Mary said.
She turned to leave, only to decide last second to reach out for Nathan’s hand and drag him along.
“Come on, we’ve got class.”
—
Mary hated Wednesday’s.
Smack in the middle of the week. Taunting her that she’s only made it halfway through the school week. Had another two days to go. Also happened to be the only day of the week she shared a class with Lola.
The girl has caused trouble for Mary whenever she possibly could since her and Nathan kissed. They hadn’t seen each other since that day. Three weeks ago! And yet Lola was still on her case about it the obsessive bitch.
Mary wished to retaliate, but she was so close to getting an apprenticeship and didn’t want to fuck it up. If she did, there was the possibility of her sitting behind a desk in a hotel, answering calls when people booked a room for a night or several. Speaking to those who needs assistance when they come to the front desk and whatever else the job requires.
The Hatford’s owned a hotel. The possibility of her working there was high.
Mid thought, she failed to notice a door opening and walked right into it. Because of course she did. She could hear Lola’s snickers and had to breathe, happy thoughts, calm down before she risked it all and punched the girl.
Rubbing her nose, she moved out of the way, waving off whoever it was trying to apologise and made to walk up a set of stairs. Only for someone to come crashing into her. Mary begged the gods or whoever would listen that it wasn’t Nathan.
She told them to get fucked when she met blue eyes and red hair. Carrot boy was on top of her and not in the pleasant way. He stared down at Mary surprised, not yet moving to get off. Moments went by and he still had yet to move.
So she pushed him off and didn’t say anything when he hit the stairs.
Missed his face heating up. Mary was too busy fanning her face to cool down as she rushed away.
—
Half a year later, maybe even close to a year, who knows, of Mary never seeing Nathan again since they graduated and she was beginning to forget about him. Sort of.
She couldn’t look at carrots without thinking of him. Asshole would sit in her lap and she would think of Nathan’s lips on hers. Mary would see stairs and think of him on top of her, then her thoughts would go down from there where she would have a cold shower.
Mary often found herself on a roof and she remembered him holding her. Looking at red pens remind her of the first time she technically met him. She burnt the year book that she’d circled his picture in.
She never got her apprenticeship and blamed him. Despite him not doing anything.
Then one day, she found herself and Stuart walking towards a warehouse. News about it being turned into a butcher house caught their ears and the siblings were sent to check it out. The place was empty, but whoever did this were stupid and left a lot of tracks that she and her brother covered up.
Usually they wouldn’t bother, but Kengo Moriyama’s orders were something they couldn’t ignore if they wanted to avoid trouble with the guy and his family. The main branch anyway, turns out he didn’t care for the second.
Apparently Kengo was interested in this persons work. Stuart made comments about how the Moriyama’s made a lot of hits and suddenly someone rises butchering people? Well, apparently that was a selling point and a must. Mary only rolled her eyes but nonetheless agreed.
“It’s weird you know?” Mary spoke into the darkness, her steps light and she walked. “Kengo wanting us to found this butcher for him. Sure, us Hatford’s know how to track, but surely there’s a Moriyama out there who also knows or knows someone who can.”
“Can you be quiet?” A voice hissed, walking behind or besides her. She wasn’t sure. “The butcher could be right around the corner and you would have just alerted them.”
Mary could only roll her eyes and stopped. “Go wait outside.” She ordered, slapping the other when they went to protest. “Oh look, suddenly the butcher has killed yet again and it was you, he killed as he ran, pity.” She mused and grinned as the other left.
She continued on her way. Alone. Wondered if she should regret her choice. Threw that idea out the window and she stepped in blood. Too late now.
A gurgle of blood and coughing peaked her interest. A silent scream. The closer she got, she saw a tongue laying on the ground.
Mary had to hold back a groan when she looked up and saw Lola. Why her of all people!?
She waited it out, taking a seat on the ground and watched. Lola left a different way then Mary came in.
Sighing, Mary stood, dusting off her pants as she walked closer to the mutilated body. Only to be tackled to the ground the second she took three steps.
“Mary?”
She groaned. Not from the pain. But from the voice. Because of course. Of fucking course.
She opened her eyes and was face to face with her carrot boy.
“Long time no see.” She found herself whispering.
Nathan stared a moment before he sent her giddy look. Excited to see her and as if unable to stop him, had ducked down and crashed his lips to hers in a heated kiss.
When he pulled back, they were both breathing heavily. Mary felt like this was some crazy dream she was having. She felt light. Then her face heated and her hands came up to cover her face in embarrassment.
Nathan only laughed and sat up, bringing her with him so that sat face to face.
“Sorry, should have asked.” He said, looking down at his lap then noticed all the blood over him. Looked back up and noticed he got blood on her. “Ah fuck, sorry, I didn’t mean to get blood on you, but hey, it’s not mine this time.”
Mary could only laugh, not minding the blood on her. She was an underground doctor anyway, this was nothing. She cupped his face and leaned forward to give him a gentle kiss that didn’t last long and stood up.
“Take it you’re the Butcher of Baltimore then?” She asked, expecting no answer as he stood and towered over her. She almost whined because he just got taller since they last saw each other.
“How’s Lola? Still together?” She hummed, giving him a teasing look and moved out of his way when he went to hold her. Instead moving over to look over his work.
It hadn’t stopped him from attempting and succeeding to hold her once more. Turning her around so that they were facing one another. Him looking down and her up. Before he was lifting her up, her arms instinctively slipping around his shoulders and legs around his waist. He held her by her thighs, all so that they could be eye level.
He wasn’t even that tall, she was just short. He was maybe two heads taller then her, or one and a half head, regardless, the height was there.
“Very funny,” He gave her an unamused look. Eyes looking her over, taking in her appearance and noting not much had changed.
“Hadn’t realised you were a killer.” She said.
“You never asked.” He replied.
“Were you aware of my family?”
“Not until recently, though I should have suspected something when you were my doctor one night.”
“You know about the Moriyama’s?”
A sigh.
“Should I?”
“Yeah, the big guy, head of the family, is looking to have you.” She informed.
“Do I have a choice?”
Mary only smiled, moving her arm so that she could tap his nose. “Nope.” She answered, popping the p.
Nathan looked deep in thought as he held her. Mary could only think about how he was on top of her and now holding her in his arms.
How he had kissed her in greeting.
Seemed to like how she kissed him in return.
“Are you going to take me to him?” He questioned, hoisting her up when she started to slip. Her arms going back around him, one hand choosing to touch his hair, wondering if he would let her wash it.
“Yeah.” She sighed, wondering how this would even work. They hadn’t even talked about the kind of relationship they could possibly have. All they interactions had been random encounters.
“On one condition then.” He said, holding her closer, if that were even possible. Their bodies pressed together. Her legs tightened around him, when he raised her up so that she was the one looking down at him.
“Am I going to like this condition?”
“Depends on your answer.” Nathan said.
“Will Lola like this condition?” She asked, laughing at the look he gave her for even thinking to ask that. “Okay, okay, what’s the condition?”
“Be mine.”
Her laugh was silenced with those two words. His ears turned red as they stared at each other. Him anxiously waiting for a reply and her trying to control the feelings she felt.
She snorted.
“Only if you be mine in return.”
Nathan kissed her.
Mary sighed into it, enjoying the moment. Despite the corpse behind them. Though she supposed it was the start of many others to be found in her life with Nathan around.
“Ah you’ll have to meet Asshole’s babies, turns out she was a girl.” She murmured against his lips. Smiling at the answering laugh.
“Is that how you found out? From her being pregnant?”
Mary could only nod with a laugh, kissing him once more. Though it didn’t last long as they were both in a fit of giggles that he ended up almost dropping her if she hadn’t been holding on.
To think this all started with a red pen.
[it is now 1am and theres high chance of many spelling errors and shit that doesn’t make sense lmao]
won’t lie, @baylecn really unknowingly motivated me to do this and I didn’t mean for it to be so long help
Guess who finally watched the Batman movie and right after this read a bunch of Fanfics, where they throw a young Robin/Dick Grayson at Battinson
…It’s me
and I’m gonna do that too^^